Once a Bride | Wedding Lessons For Life

Malena & David Renewing their Vows in Jamaica

This is it, plain and simple … Whether you’ve been dreaming about your wedding since you were 10 or you swore you would never get married, once you say yes and start planning your wedding, you’re embarking on a journey that will form you, teach you life skills, and give you a whole new perspective on life.

Your New Life … I was one of those girls who thought I did not want a big wedding, a glamorous life, or to be around my kids 24/7, and I definitely was not going to voluntarily put my career on hold. Well, all that changed once I said yes to my very own Prince Charming. I dove into wedding planning bliss with such force that I had to ask, “Who are you, and what have you done with Malena?”
Under the Gazebo … After their 10th Anniversary on a trip with their two children to Jamaica, Malena & David renewed their vows.

Just Married! Malena & DavidMy life took a severe turn, but it also calmed me down and made me feel fulfilled and so hopeful about the future! That is what planning a wedding will do. You finally know where and in whose arms you are going to be forever and realize you have a whole new adventure ahead of you.

From now on, you will be creating memories with the same person, every day.

Enjoy that moment of realization. It energizes you so. Take it all in, because few moments in your life will give you that kind of intense hope and feeling of serene happiness.

Your New Adventure …

Almost everything you go through and every lesson you learn in planning your wedding — is something you will keep experiencing and using throughout your life.

Playing The Bride …

My first real experience with the “Wedding Dream” was as a model. I did hundreds of fashion shows, decked out in amazing gowns. I even fell in one or two! I did magazine editorials styled like Carrie Bradshaw in “Sex and the City.” I even did the cover of Manhattan Bride.

With Harry Belafonte, when he received France's highest award, the Legion of HonorI looked into the eyes of my loving husband in front of Niagara Falls … and then another husband and then another … each one better looking than the next. We immersed ourselves in the roles of newlyweds, totally in love and oblivious to the fact that we were all “hired help,” that we had probably met each other for the first time on a modeling gig.

For one short moment, we were all having that feeling of intense hope. Even for a moment. And the reason is of course, that a wedding is just absolutely magical!

Harry, Sarafina, Amadeus, Malena & David Belafonte, as Harry Belafonte received the Legion of Honour, France’s highest award, from the French Ambassador.

Wedding Day Magic, Forever …

Another magical thing is that almost everything you go through in planning your wedding is something you will keep experiencing throughout your life. How to deal with rowdy family members, controlling in-laws, friends who love you but don’t really take weddings seriously; all those issues will continue to be part of your life.

Malena in the ParkThe fight about the flower arrangements and décor will be the same fight you will have with your mate over how to decorate your home or what color to paint the walls. The way you include children in your wedding will be an indication as to how you will deal with kids, until you get your own. Your easy-going ways around wedding time will surely be a great asset in your life moving forward and the way you include your family in all your wedding plans will be the way you will include your family in most aspects of your life.

The softness and sweetness of a bride can be called upon all through your life. You will be able to tap into a more emotional, organized, patient, and creative place than ever before. 

New Skills …

The day you start planning your wedding is the day life has given you a very special opportunity to make the best of who you are.  It’s your chance to really sharpen your personal tool kit, all the emotional and intellectual ways you deal with difficult situations. You’ll polish your skills in communications, understanding, and psychology and become better at handling issues that arise and solving them before they become larger than life.

My tool kit has continued to expand, and I look back at my wedding day realizing that I did the absolute best with the skills I had then, I even borrowed a few and had to make my own. And now, if I were to redo my vows in another big wedding ceremony, I would not change much, though I might sharpen certain things and include a few more people in my happy moment. And since I am “Once a Bride, Always a Bride,” I will do just that: I will plan another wedding with my same dear and very own Prince Charming. But this time I will include at least two more special people — our sweet kids — who love mommy’s tool kit.

Once a Bride, Always a Bride, by Malena Belafonte