Manhattan Bride Wedding Magazine

Wedding Day

Wedding Day Experts:
Receptions
Cakes
Ceremony & Vows
Floral Design
Invitations
Music
Perfect Wedding Tips
Photography/Video
Rehearsal Dinners
Green Weddings

Wedding Planner

Your Own Style

Elegant Hotel Wedding

Wedding Contest

Bridal Resources:
Invitations, Venues, Caterers, Wedding Planners, Music, Photography/Video, Tuxedos, Ballroom, Services, Floral Design, Cakes/Chocolates

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MANHATTAN WEDDING PLANNER

1. STYLE: You can simplify your entire planning process by first choosing the "Style, Theme & General Location" of your ceremony and wedding.

The "STYLE" you choose will guide you in making almost every decision. It also will eliminate many potential conflicts by also guiding friends and family as well in making more constructive suggestions.

For example, choose a garden wedding, and your dress, menu, flowers and music will be different than if you have a hotel wedding. And once your friends and family know your initial choices, they will be more on target with their ideas, and enjoy being more helpful.

2. BUDGET: Set a financial budget, breaking it down by general categories. Then decide who will pay for each of the various items.

3. TASKS: Who will handle each task? Do you need to hire a wedding planner? Refer to your checklist, like this one we’ve prepared for you.

4. RESOURCES & SUPPLIERS: Now your most important decisions will revolve around who will be providing your essential wedding day services. Check our Resource Lists for hundreds of local suppliers, from "Music" to "Hotels," presented in over 30 categories.

Finally, as you thoughtfully evaluate all your suppliers, we encourage you to use the methods of evaluation in our publication and on this website, as presented by the experts in their respective fields.

Now, with your style, budget, resource list, and wedding planner by your side, have fun planning!

Also, we're often asked about Etiquette, Seating Arrangements, and Guest Lists, and we've included some comments below on each area.

6-12 months

Ceremony

Set an approximate date.
Determine the approximate number of guests for your ceremony.
Decide if the ceremony will be taking place at the reception site.
Choose your ceremony site.
Choose the officiant or clergyman.

Reception

Choose several possible reception sites.
If your site doesn’t serve food, or if you have specialized requirements (kosher menu), choose several possible caterers.
If you are not acquainted with the chef's dishes, sample the menu.
Choose your site and your caterer.
Finalize your date and reserve your site and caterer.
Notify and reserve your ceremony site and officiant or clergyman.

Invitation

Begin the extended period of compiling your guest list.

Gown

With your theme and location in mind, begin shopping for your gown, veil, shoes and gloves.

Bridal Party

Choose your maid of honor, best man, bridesmaids and groomsmen.
Choose dress colors and begin shopping for dresses or fabrics.

Beauty

Thinking of changing your hair color? Use this time to experiment.

Musicians

Choose several possible musicians, get their tapes and see them perform.
Choose and reserve your musicians.

Florist

Meet with florists and view samples of place settings from your finalists.
Choose and reserve your florist.
Determine the time florists will arrive at ceremony and reception site(s). (Most do so several hours beforehand. Inform your venue of florist’s planned arrival time.)

Photographers/Videographers

Interview photographers and videographers, review stills, videos and their working style.
Choose and reserve your photographer & videographer.

Wedding Cake

Meet with cake makers; view and taste samples.
Choose your cake maker.

Honeymoon

Set your budget.
Select a travel agent.
Begin planning and possibly booking your honeymoon. How far ahead depends on which location and in which season you plan to travel.
If limited space requires early reservation, reserve your hotel, specifying room view, smoking/non-smoking.

Announcing Your Wedding

Check with your hometown and New York newspapers regarding engagement announcements and place one.

New Apartment

This is Manhattan, so if you want to get a new home—rental, condo, co-op or country—it’s time to set your budget, discuss what you want and choose a broker.
Does your desired new home change your registry ideas?

4-6 months

ETIQUETTE & STYLE ... We have a particular philosophy here at Manhattan Bride. Rather than listing specific rules of etiquette for various situations, we advocate a gracious, caring approach to all your guests ... family members, members of your bridal party, and friends.

If you were a guest at your wedding ... how would you want to be greeted initially (your invitation and other correspondence, emails, and calls) ... then, how would you want to be greeted upon first entering the venue ... and also upon taking your seat at the reception dinner?

We suggest putting yourself in the place of your guests, and, with your groom, determine just how gracious, welcoming, and sensitive to your guests' needs and feelings you want to be. For example you can ... Before the wedding, send a special letter or email with comments about your "Wedding Weekend" and a list of activities ... For the ceremony, create a "Wedding Program" that welcomes your guests and provides details about your ceremony and your bridal party, while thanking everyone you want to acknowledge ... For the ceremony and reception, appoint key friends, family members, or bridal party guests to play special welcoming roles at the wedding, and also to help in introducing guests where and when appropriate.

For the reception itself, as another example, if you like to dance to the newest salsa music, and yet you are having a number of older people from both sides of the family, you can be self-focused and choose to only play salsa for yourselves and a portion of your friends. Or you can be more thoughtful and in addition to the music you like, mix in some 70's dance music with some oldies that would appeal to the older portion of your crowd as well. (Your band or DJ can offer suggestions.)

Likewise, if you like meat and only have meat dishes available, what of the vegetarians who might not eat such dishes, or those guests who might prefer fish? (Your venue can offer suggestions or a selection of 1-3 choices at the table.) There are tradeoffs in every area like this.

Your wedding is an opportunity to introduce the new sense of style and entertaining that the two of you, as a newly married couple, will exhibit when you welcome people into your home and your life.

Let your thoughtfulness be your guide.

Ceremony

Determine the items to be rented, such as chairs, and order them.
Prepare your wedding vows.
Choose flowers and other decorations.

Reception

Plan your “Wedding Day Timetable” and refer to it in all your future planning.
Determine items to be rented and order them (tables & chairs, tablewear, etc.).
Choose and order wedding cake and if you choose to have them, favors.
Choose and order your flowers and any other decorations.

Invitations

Finalize your guest list.
Determine which guests get ceremony cards and which get direction cards.
Design maps or get a map from the venue.
Order invitations, direction cards, thank-you notes, stationery, guest book, programs, place cards, menus,
wedding announcements and other personalized items.

Gown/Tux

Order your gown and his tuxedo. (Get a new wedding tux!)
Purchase your bride/groom shoes and bridal hosiery and accessories.

Bridal Party

Coordinate mothers’ attire.
Shop for attendants’ accessories.
Appoint responsibilities to members of your bridal party.
Schedule fittings and order bridesmaids’ and groomsmen’s attire.

Beauty

Color and trim hair.
Experiment with hair styles.
Meet with makeup artists.

Out-of-Town Guests

Determine the approximate number of out-of-town guests you will be inviting.
Allocate “follow-up” responsibilities to you, your groom or a member of your bridal party.
Inform your out-of- town guests of dates.
Make hotel reservations or ask friends to house them.
If you expect your out-of-town guests to be in the city for several days, plan a multi-day list of activities, deciding which ones need to be “hosted,” and by whom.

Services

Get signed contracts from all wedding professionals.
Decide whether you will have a security official on hand, make arrangements.
Begin planning your rehearsal dinner.
Book a room for your wedding night.
Choose and then purchase your wedding bands.

Transportation

Choose and reserve your limousine service for you and your groom, and for the bridal party.

Honeymoon

Secure your honeymoon location and hotel.
Obtain visa/passport if traveling abroad, and arrange time for a pickup (recheck the information on the final copy).
Obtain airplane tickets.
Reserve a rental car.
Purchase luggage, if needed.

Registry

Choose your wedding outlets.
Register.
Write thank-you notes for gifts you’ve received.

New Home

Now that you’ve seen several locations, sharpen your requirements and your budget, giving any new ideas to your broker.

2-3 months

GUEST LISTS ... There are many ways to create your guest lists. Ultimately, you and your groom will have one list, and your respective parents will each have their own lists.

Depending on how you have worked out payment arrangements between the 3 sets of couples, the size of your venue, or some other factors, each will be allowed a certain number of guests. This will result in three sets of guest lists, which will be provided to you or to your planner. (Once all the names are set, they will be given to your calligrapher.)

If you have a budget (and of course there is always a budget, whether big or small), then you and your groom, and your respective parents, will each have a maximum number of guests allowed. At that point everyone can tailor their lists accordingly.

Ceremony

Check marriage license requirements.
Take your blood tests.
Finalize ceremony with your officiant.

Reception

Purchase cake top decoration and cake cutting set; have it engraved if you want to.
Meet with your caterer about your menu.

Invitations

Hire a calligrapher and give him/her invitations, announcements and place cards to address, plus your schedule requirements.

Gown/Tux

Try on dress, tux and shoes.
Purchase gifts for attendants.
Continue fittings and make final changes.
Finalize attendants’ accessories.
Arrange any additional transportation for attendants.

Beauty

Schedule beauty appointments.
Color/Trim your hair.
Reserve your makeup artist.

Out-of-Town Guests

Finalize lodging and meals for out-of-town guests.
Contact out-of-town guests with details.

Other Bridal Events

Arrange flowers and decorations for your rehearsal dinner.
Finalize the rehearsal dinner.

Honeymoon

Finalize your reservations.
Purchase honeymoon fashions.
If travelling abroad, speak to your doctor about any regional inoculations.
If you’re going to a very adventurous location (the Amazon comes to mind) check with the Center for Disease Control in Atlanta.

New Home

Take the pressure off. Though you want to be in your new home after your honeymoon, develop interim solutions.
Once you’ve found your new home, plan the final details for your move, real estate closing and address change notifications.

1-2 months

SEATING ARRANGEMENTS ... Lists provided by the bridal couple and your two sets of parents determine the seating. Simply let each set of parents and you and your groom determine the seating for your own groups.

At the wedding reception itself, a good general idea is to reserve the tables nearest the dance floor and the band (where the music is usually the loudest), for the younger people and the known dancers. And again, keep the three sets of invited guests in tables that are near each other.

Within each list, a lot of your seating will probably be dictated by practical considerations. For example, are there any older people, those with medical conditions, or children who might need more frequent access to the rest rooms? Put them at tables nearest the exits closest to the rest rooms.

Any very young children involved? Ask your venue about a special “babysitters” room, or the bride's room, where they can be supervised away from the wedding for a while, and sit them near the exit to that room.

Then, and this requires the most intuitive consideration, within each given set of guests, are there any individuals or couples who you know would prefer to be with each other? Any guests who you feel would enjoy each other's company? Try to place them at the same table, or at adjacent tables.

On the other hand, within most families there are often those who would rather not be with each other. It might be wise to place them at different, non-adjacent tables.

As you set your final seating list, start with those tables that are easiest to "assemble." Then seat the couples remaining. If you are having difficulty, see if your venue can accommodate tables of 8 or 12, as well as 10 (the most typical size). These different-sized tables often can solve your final seating riddles.

Though creating a seating chart is always trying, take heart. Once it is set, there is great joy in picturing your family and friends interacting with everyone at the tables you've assembled.

With your finished chart in hand ... imagine the setting as your guests take their seats. You can almost see their smiles, hear their comments, feel their excitement. Your wedding reception is about to begin!

Ceremony

Finalize rehearsal details.
Get your marriage license.
If you are going to take your husband’s name, arrange for name change on legal documents.
Send your wedding announcements to the newspapers.
Pick up your rings. Do they fit? (Just checking.)
Pick up all ceremony accessories: goblets, ring bearer’s pillow, etc.
Finalize music with musicians and give them your schedule, in writing, having reviewed it with your wedding planner and on-site manager.

Reception

Make a seating plan.
Plan a receiving line, if you intend to have one. (Many wedding planners, however, strongly discourage a receiving line, saying it ties up your wedding guests for too long.)

Invitations

Mail your invitations 5-8 weeks prior to your wedding.

Gown

Dress fitting.
Try on your shoes to make sure they fit.
Tux fitting.

Bridal Party

Pick up tuxedos and dresses; make sure they fit.
Double check attendants’ accessories.
Make beauty appointments.
Review attendants’ duties.
Appoint one attendant to gift collection and security.

Beauty

Touch up hair color/trim hair.
Facial. (This is your last before the wedding.)
Try on your wedding day makeup. Make sure you aren’t allergic and that you like it. Out-of-Town Guests
Make sure all out-of-towner plans are finalized, and your out-of-town guests know where to go and when.

Services

Make sure all details are finalized with wedding professionals.
If photos are being taken before the ceremony, ask your photographer when your bridal party should be ready, and inform them.
Give photo checklist to your photographer and videographer.

Honeymoon

Reconfirm reservations and, with hotel concierge, book any events you plan on attending.
If you prefer to travel with travellers checks, get them and also record their numbers.
Arrange airport transportation.
Finish purchasing honeymoon fashions.
Make arrangements for pets.

Registry

Continue sending thank-you notes.

1-2 weeks

Ceremony

Prepare checks.
Place your marriage license in hands of person responsible for bringing it to the ceremony.
Review the ceremony and associated responsibilities with your attendants.
Arrange for room with gifts to be guarded or locked at a certain time.

Reception

Make a final review and update of your wedding day timetable.
Prepare checks.
Review responsibilities with attendants.
Give caterer and venue final count and reconfirm arrival time and other arrangements.
Finalize seating plan and review seating with caterer, wedding planner or on-site manager.

Invitations

Address wedding announcements.

Gown/Tux

Final dress fitting.
Try tux on.
Make arrangements to have tux and dress pressed.
Break in shoes (indoors).

Bridal Party

Try on dresses.
Give officiant’s fee in a sealed envelope to the best man, to give after the ceremony.

Beauty

Waxing and eyebrows.
Pack all wedding day supplies, label where they are going (dressing room, ceremony, reception), and give them to attendant responsible for delivering them.
Confirm beauty appointments for wedding day.

Out-of-Town Guests

Reconfirm lodging and transportation.

Services

Contact all wedding professionals to secure details and times.
Confirm all wedding transportation.

Honeymoon

Get tickets, boarding passes etc. from travel agent, if needed.
Confirm airport transportation.
Arrange for mail to be held by post office or picked up by a friend/family member.
Stop newspaper delivery.
Stop bridal registry deliveries.
Confirm arrangements for your pet.
Distribute itinerary to family and/or close friends.
Prepare house for your absence, emptying refrigerator, etc.
Finish packing (This is the payoff—make these preparations fun!)

Other Bridal Events

Contact rehearsal dinner guests.
Write rehearsal dinner and wedding day toasts.
Attend rehearsal dinner and present gifts to attendants.
Rehearse your ceremony.

Wedding Day Scheduling

Refer to your wedding day timetable, and remember, all details are now behind you. This is your day to laugh, dance, eat, drink, talk, touch. Thoroughly enjoy yourselves!